Turning Away From Success

I was speaking to someone about my blog regarding the Cost of Dreams, and they mentioned someone who was constantly “sabotaging” himself because of his fear of success. Sure enough, there are people who do this: “What if I can’t handle this? I know … I will fail so I don’t have to find out what I am capable of!” However, this is not the case in every person that appears to constantly have his efforts thwarted.

We say, “O, that poor fellow, he would have succeeded had he not sabotaged himself by falling asleep during the job interview!” "My, my, my, it is so sad that the relationship she wanted was sabotaged by her forgetfulness in showing up for dates.” Question: Did they sabotage themselves, or were they successful in actually achieving what they truly wanted: the pity and emotional support (and sometimes financial) of all their friends.

For others, another reason for not achieving success is feelings of unworthiness and guilt, or even fear of being (or appearing) prideful. (Many people don’t mind being prideful as much as they do appearing prideful!) “Look at how Robert the Righteous suffers: he is far more worthy of success than I am. And what of Humble Harry, God? He has suffered setback after setback: how could I accept this success when I am not nearly as humble as he is? Wouldn’t it be prideful to accept these blessings? And what will my fellow Christians think if they hear about this raise/new relationship/new house/sports car? Won’t they think I am full of pride?”

Helloooo? At the end of the day is anyone “worthy” of God’s blessings? And what happened to Paul’s admonition to rejoice with those who rejoice? “That isn’t right: you aren’t humble ... you are a sinner (and they aren't?) ... I haven’t ever experienced such success, what makes you so special?” Isn’t this a sign of faulty character in those who refuse to celebrate our successes with us? And should we sacrifice our success and happiness on the altar of their faulty character?

Me: O Lord, I just can’t accept the rewards, the success that has come my way. I feel guilty, and soooo fear being prideful.

God: Okay, give them back to me.

Me: Lord, here: take it all back.

God: Now – receive these blessings, without guilt or pride, and simply enjoy it as my gift to you.

Copyright, Monte E Wilson, 2008